Knock knock. You open the door even though you aren’t expecting anyone. You find a lovely couple at your door, bearing a cake. “Did you forget? It’s your birthday!” * There are couples who do this sort of outreach on a weekly basis. Mrs. Miriam Bitton tells us how it works.
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“We got married a year and two months ago,” says Miriam. “Two weeks after the wedding, R’ Dovber Chaviv asked my husband what he thought of doing mivtzaim at kibbutzim. This project is over twenty years old and was initiated by R’ Yaakov Ben Ari. R’ Ben Ari discovered that there are places where they won’t allow religion to gain a foothold, whether because of a lack of connection or because of antagonistic feelings. So he came up with a format which says: We are not coming to you to talk about religion. We are coming to say mazal tov on your birthday. And you know what? It works! People are moved when someone remembers their birthday even though they don’t know them. |
How does it work? There are people who signed up and some supplied the names, addresses, and birthdates of their friends. Then we go with a smile and a birthday kit, without making prior arrangements. We simply walk into the kibbutz and ask someone where the birthday boy or girl lives and knock at their door.
The truth is, at first we were hesitant. For me personally, it sounded hard. I was married all of two weeks and everything seemed hard … Also, I couldn’t understand why anyone would let us into their homes. They are not religious. They don’t know us. Would I let someone into my house if they knocked at my door and asked to come in to discuss life?
In the end we made the commitment, and very quickly it went from a scary project to a fun experience for us. We traveled, saw pretty sights, met new, colorful people, so that every outing was a story. The story is not always extraordinary, but there’s always a story. Despite our outer appearance, we have much in common. It has already been said that people on kibbutzim are essentially religious; just without a beard and peios. It’s amazing to discover how true this is. You just need to make the first connection, which in our case is a birthday, and things move on from there. In general, talking to someone about their birthday is brilliant. You touch a person in such a personal way and he immediately melts. People would ask: What?! You came for me? Because of my birthday? Really?
We often say we came for the birthday of X and then Mr. X says, “You made a mistake. It was a week ago / in a few more days.” That gives us the perfect opening to explain the idea of a Hebrew birthday and the significance of the day.
Tell us some stories.
Since we come without making prior arrangements, it often happens that the person is not at home. In that case, we stroll around the kibbutz and sometimes have a cup of coffee with someone we meet.
We once went to Kibbutz Mizra, a kibbutz that is considered a tough place, in terms of feelings towards Judaism. It’s the only place in the country where they have persisted in finding a loophole in the law that enables them to raise pigs.
We went there and looked for a woman whose birthday it was. A friendly woman by the name of Paula Fine told us where to go and said that if the birthday girl wasn’t home we were invited to her house. The birthday girl wasn’t home and so we went to the Fines. Paula told us that she was from Brazil. Her mother was a descendant of those Jews, known as anusim, who were forcibly converted. When she came to Eretz Yisroel, she was advised to undergo a giyur l’chumra.
She met her husband and they married and moved back to Brazil. They lived there for fifteen years. In Brazil they were religious and their son went to a religious school.
They moved back to Eretz Yisroel two years ago and settled in Mizra. She was very disappointed since there is nothing religious about the kibbutz and the move was very hard for her. She was unwilling to remain on the kibbutz for holidays, but you can’t move out every other Shabbos and so they spend Shabbos on the kibbutz, without a Shabbos atmosphere and without a shul. But this is not what she wanted to tell us.
Two or three years ago, her husband studied electrical installation. This included practical demonstrations which they had at a construction site so they could see the work being done on the roof. One wrong move sent him falling from the roof into a big box containing a machine with many electrical feeds. The level of current was very high so that if someone would touch it, he would be electrocuted. Miraculously, he jumped out and remained alive, but then fell into a coma.
Paula sat at his bedside, distraught. In the next bed was the wife of the mayor of Kiryat Shmona. One day, the shliach from Kiryat Shmona came to visit her. When Paula saw him, she asked him to bless her husband. The shliach gave her a picture of the Rebbe and said to put it under her husband’s pillow and all would be well.
Today, things are truly far better than “well.” Her husband is functioning as normal so that the fall is practically forgotten.
Speaking of hospitals, on a different kibbutz we went to a family whose grandson was in an accident with a wild boar. He was in a coma for a month, completely paralyzed. At first he was in Beit Washington but when they saw there was no progress, they told the family to move him to the geriatric department where he’d stay until the end of his life.
This was on Chanuka and we showed up at the grandmother’s house. When they saw us, they called the boy’s father and invited him to come over too. He lit the menorah and told us about his son. We told him, “Let’s write to the Rebbe and make a good resolution.”
He committed to putting on t’fillin once a week and in the letter it said, “simcha poretzes geder.” We turned on some music and the men danced. The joy truly broke through all barriers and the next day, his son woke up! The family constantly tells of this miracle. The boy recovered completely and walks and talks like any normal person.
There are many other miracle stories. We see the Rebbe and the miracles that he does. The amazing thing is that these are people who are not connected to rabbanim and to t’fillos, or so it seems, but they have a warm feeling for Judaism that we don’t see anywhere else.
Can you tell us a story to illustrate that?
One day, we went to Kibbutz Afikim. A Russian was on guard at the entrance and he did not let us in, as per regulations, but he agreed to put on t’fillin. Then he wanted to daven Shmoneh Esrei while wearing the t’fillin. Of course, my husband agreed. The guard stood there for half an hour. I watched him pray and it was a wondrous sight. A Jew who looked so distant, religiously, was praying with such concentration!
On Rosh HaShana we went to Kibbutz Kamon and had the Yom Tov meals and t’fillos there. We went with another couple and some bachurim, some of them Mizrachniks, who completed the minyan. It was a very special atmosphere. The davening took place in the kibbutz library because there was no shul.
On the first day we davened Sephardic style and the next day Ashkenazi style so everyone would feel included. Deep, meaningful discussions ensued. By the end of Rosh HaShana, the Mizrachi boys began learning the D’var Malchus with whoever passed by, about the Shor HaBar and the Leviasan.
A final story for “dessert.” We went to Kibbutz Dovrat. We were looking for someone and found someone else on the street who said to us, “You are not the first Chabadnikim I am meeting.”
He had been with R’ Yisroel Halperin in the reserves and he remembered how whenever R’ Halperin had a question, he immediately sent it to the Rebbe. This was thirty years ago. The man said, “Whenever he (Rabbi Halperin) would come, I would put on t’fillin because there was no other option.”
To conclude?
There are kibbutzim in town too, by which I mean, you can use this format everywhere, in any city, neighborhood and moshav. You simply show up and sit down to talk about something personal, a birthday, a family simcha, or anything else that is important to the person.
You need to find the people and what interests them and the relationship will take off. I advise every Lubavitcher who wants to speed things up to adopt this idea. The cost is minimal and the satisfaction is enormous. May we merit to give the Rebbe much nachas and may he be revealed already because we are all ready.