Fewer Guests, More Yiras Shamayim
October 31, 2019
The Rebbe in #1187, Chasuna, From the Rebbe's pen

An answer from the Rebbe replying to a query of a Chosson and Kallah who were experiencing difficulty in arranging their wedding banquet to be with a Mechitzah, so they asked whether they should cancel the banquet altogether, and conduct only a Chuppah:

באם החו”כ [החתן והכלה] שי’ שואלים המענה הוא: בכלל, ובפרט בחתונה שזהו היסוד לכל החיים שלאחרי זה – העיקר הוא שיסדרו כל הענינים (ובפרט – החופה וכו’) שיהי’ המַקסימום האפשרי דיר”ש [דיראת שמים] (כולל – שלילת תערובות וכו’) – ובאם הדרך אויספירן זה – ע”י חופה וסעודה לאח”כ [לאחר-כן] במספר מצומצם דמוזמנים (רק הקרובים ביותר וכו’ – ולא באולם גדול וכו’) – יעשו כן. אלא שצ”ל בהסכמת החתן וכלה גם יחד.

If it is the Chosson and Kallah ’שי themselves who are asking this question, then the answer is:

In general, regarding all matters, and specifically regarding a wedding — which becomes the foundation of the entire life following it — the main thing is to ensure that all its aspects (especially the Chuppah, etc.) should be conducted in the maximally possible level of Yiras Shamayim (that includes preventing improper mixing).

If the way to ensure this is by conducting the Chuppah and the wedding feast afterward with a limited number of guests (only the very close relatives, etc., and not in a large hall, etc.) — this should be done.

But this must be done with the consent of both the Chosson and Kallah unanimously.

Article originally appeared on Beis Moshiach Magazine (http://www.beismoshiachmagazine.org/).
See website for complete article licensing information.