An incident was recently brought to my attention that caused me much heartache and aggravation. In the belief that only by identifying the ills that take place in our society are we enabled to cure them, I received permission from one of the parties involved to share it with you, in the hope that you can learn something from it. The one who told it to me stipulated that I change the main details, to protect the identities of those involved.
WHAT IS YOUR JOB EXACTLY?
A young man, we’ll call him Chaim, moved to a certain city and established a Yeshiva there which he headed (and again, the actual story is NOT about a Rosh Yeshiva, I am merely altering these details to prevent anyone from being able to guess who it’s really about). Chaim initially ran his Yeshiva single-handedly, managing both the gashmius and the ruchnius. He achieved a large measure of success, as the Yeshiva acquired a sterling reputation. Gradually, as the size of the Yeshiva increased, he found it too difficult to carry the burden alone, and he hired another fellow, Moshe, to help him out. Moshe was to be involved both in administration and in fundraising, but his overall job description was to provide assistance to R’ Chaim, so that he would be able to better carry out his role as head of the Yeshiva.
Now, this Moshe was a really talented individual and extremely dedicated to every aspect of the growth of the Yeshiva. He spared neither time nor effort to get positive results. But his style and approach, in many areas, differed drastically from that of R’ Chaim. Recently, this started becoming a source of constant friction between them. While both had, unquestionably, the best of intentions and only the good of the Yeshiva in mind, their conclusions were usually on a collision course. This led to the fact that Moshe, in his aim to enhance and improve the Yeshiva, began trying to restrict and tone down Chaim in every way. He felt that Chaim’s style in the running of the Yeshiva was harming his fundraising efforts.
It came to the point that Chaim felt that everything that Moshe did diminished his ability to do his job properly, while Moshe felt that if something was not done to restrict Chaim and curtail his authority, then he would not be able to properly fulfill his job. They each felt that they had the right to control what the other did.
I personally had a conversation with Moshe (whom I have known quite well for a number of years), and I said to him: “Your claim just doesn’t make any sense (in my humble opinion)! After all, your purpose, your mission, and job description is to help out Chaim. That is the sole reason why you are here. If, in even the smallest way, you’re interfering with him, you are no longer doing your job.
“If he is interfering with your job in order to perform his in a better fashion, then that may not be nice or mentchlich etc., and it may not be oisgehalten. But if the opposite takes place, and you’re the one who restricts him, then your whole position loses its legitimacy. It’s nonsensical, ridiculous even, for you in your position to suggest pushing him aside to allow for better performance of your job – which is to assist him! It’s a contradiction!
“Basically, he can’t be curtailed for the benefit of your job, because as soon as that happens, you, for all intents and purposes, don’t have a job. Not that you should be fired. Your job (which is ultimately to help out Chaim) becomes virtually non-existent!”
A LOGICAL FALLACY
I’m sure that many of you are thinking: “He can’t fool us this time. We know that it’s not a real story. It’s a made-up mashal, from which he wants to derive some convoluted lesson.”
Well, sorry to disappoint you, but this time it IS a true story. The only detail that I modified was when I wrote that I changed all the important details. In actual fact, even the important details are accurate, because it is indeed a story about a Rosh Yeshiva. In fact, I’ll tell exactly where. It’s a story about the Rosh Yeshiva of Yeshiva Shel Maala, otherwise known as the Holy One Blessed Be His Name.
You see, He used to be running things, and quite effectively, practically single-handedly. With one trusty assistant, Shmo (as in Hu U’Shmo Bilvad), they had everything under perfect control.
But this Rosh Yeshiva had plans for expansion for which He wanted, or even needed, outside assistance. Basically, He wanted to be a King. And He couldn’t be a King unless He had subjects. And Shmo didn’t count as a subject. So He decided to hire additional assistants, namely all of us (and all of them, and anyone else in between). Our “job description” is to help Him by existing, and thus being able to serve as His subjects.
And yet, sometimes He gets in the way of our existence. His demands and His way of doing things don’t allow us to do our job properly, i.e., they don’t allow us to lead a proper existence (the way we perceive that our existence is meant to be). We get annoyed and frustrated; we get impatient with the restrictions and inconveniences. We may look for loopholes, for ways of getting around the restrictive laws.
But, wait a second. Let’s keep things in perspective. Our sole job is to exist, in order to help the Eibeshter be a King (which can only be accomplished by His having subjects who are subservient to Him). It’s nonsensical, ridiculous even, for someone to suggest pushing Him aside to allow for a better existence for oneself, a better performance of one’s job. It’s a contradiction! For our job, our existence, serves only one purpose: to enable G-d to be the King of the world.
For example: You’re taking your family to a vacation spot for a week. You (perhaps rightfully) don’t view it as a luxury, but as a necessity. Both you and your rebbetzin had a challenging year, and the break is crucial for your well being. Of course, skipping davening ch”v is not an option. But to find a minyan (let alone a mikva) can pose so many scheduling and logistical challenges that it just doesn’t make sense. It’s not a matter of running after taavos or anything of that sort, ch”v. But you need to live normally, to be able to exist normally. So, essentially, you come to the conclusion that you need to very slightly push aside those rules of Shulchan Aruch that acutely disturb your existence.
But this reasoning is faulty. Your existence is not an end to itself, but merely a means to an end. You exist for one purpose: to be battul – subservient – to Hashem, thus enabling Him to fulfill His whim to be a King. Therefore, how can it be possible that your subservience to Hashem should be minimized or compromised in order to allow you to live a more complete existence?! Only if our existence helps Him in His desires is our “job” – our whole existence – justified.
TIMELY JOB DESCRIPTIONS
In fact, this is the essence of what Rosh Hashanah is all about: “Malchiyos, Kedei SheTamlichuni Aleichem.” We want the Eibeshter to renew our existence (and that of the whole world, the entire Seder Hishtalshlus), so we declare and renew our commitment to be subservient to Him, to accept upon ourselves the yoke of His Kingship, so that there should be a reason and purpose – a justification – for our continued existence. We indicate out readiness to continue doing our job – which is to enable Him to do His job – so that we can get a shot at being rehired.
And this is what begins on Rosh Chodesh Elul, when the King is in the field and we have to greet Him. Greeting Him (Kabbalas P’nei HaMelech) represents Kabbalas Ol Malchus Shamayim, renewing our commitment to be subservient to Him. This, then, is a time for us to refocus on and re-examine our perspective. The Eibeshter is not here, as a King, in order to provide us with our needs; rather, our existence, and all of the needs for which He provides us, are all in order to enable us to allow Him to experience His Kingship.
There was a Chasid of the Frierdike Rebbe, by the name of Yisroel Gottesman (but, because his last name included the name of Hashem in Yiddish, which may not be pronounced, he was known in Beis HaRav as Yisroel Baal Shem). He was originally a Poilishe Chasid, who later became acquainted with the Frierdike Rebbe and subsequently became extremely attached to him.
Once, the Frierdike Rebbe had a large crowd awaiting yechidus. However, the Frierdike Rebbe wasn’t feeling well, to such an extent that they had to discontinue the Yechidus in the middle of the schedule and send the rest of the crowd home. This R’ Yisroel, who was amongst those in line, approached the gabbai and began insisting that it’s extremely urgent and crucial that he go in to the Rebbe. The gabbai, sensing the urgency in his tone of voice and knowing the great kiruv that the Frierdike Rebbe would show him, relented and allowed him in for a brief yechidus. R’ Yisroel entered and spent his entire brief yechidus bentching the Rebbe, and wishing him all good things.
When he left, the Frierdike Rebbe commented, “Er Hot Mir Mechayeh Geven (he revived me).” In fact, the Frierdike Rebbe felt so much better that he was able to resume the yechidus meetings!
For this Chasid, a matter of urgency was not to get some bracha etc. from the Rebbe, but the opposite, to wish all good things to the Rebbe with his whole heart! I’m sure that he had many material and spiritual needs, no less than the rest of us. But they weren’t what he was there for. He was there to show concern for the welfare of the Rebbe.
This is also the idea behind what the Maggid said on the Mishna “Ein Omdim LeHispalel Ela Mitoch Koved Rosh.” One’s goal and aim in davening needs to be not the provision of our needs, but rather to provide for Hashem’s needs. Even the provision of our material needs is merely a means to provide for His needs (see Likkutei Sichos Cheilek 23 Matos maaseh, ve’od).
Now, as we begin another month of Elul, the month of cheshbon, it is a time for us to re-evaluate our priorities, to understand why we’re here, and to live our lives accordingly. We ought to know that our “job” in life is to exist in order that the Eibeshter may be a King and to fit all the different aspects of our life into that frame.
To paraphrase JFK: “Ask not what your Eibeshter can do for you, ask, rather, what you can do for your Eibeshter!”
L’chaim! May we all do our part to be Mekabel P’nei HaMelech while He’s in the field, and may He in turn complete His job and reveal His Kingship throughout the world, through the immediate revelation of Moshiach Tzidkeinu Teikef U’miyad Mamash!!!
From a written farbrengen directed towards Alumni of Yeshivas Lubavitch Toronto